Davids eBlog ePisode 6, "TBA"
Welcome back to my eBlog. I have decided to change them from “versions” to ePisodes. I have to keep this fresh and trendy and on the cutting edge. There are many people out there trying to copy me. I am the Rolex, they are the Rolox.
There are many flavors of milk served here: Chocolate, Strawberry, Banana, and spoiled. There are also several flavors of Gatorade: Yellow, Red, Purple, and icky Orange (none of which come spoiled). Why is it that milk is referred to by flavor and Gatorade by color? Is that a diss to Gatorade to identify it by color rather than flavor?
I am still at my “Super-Secret Forward Operating Location.” My time here is almost up. It will be a shame; I will miss the waking up and it already being 100F. I will miss the food that sounds good but doesn’t taste it (including the fries served without salt). I will miss working on a small conference table with 4 other people. Most of all, I will miss the 4AM walk to the bathroom from being required to drink so much water.
So they have poker tournaments and spades tournaments here on base. I ended up getting 4th in the poker last week and 3rd in spades.
Your Monday Morning Fix: So you didn’t get an ePisode of my time of an undisclosed location that is hot as hell in your inbox on Monday morning (duh!). I actually got more emails on Monday asking where it than any other topic, including votes from the poll. I know you love me, but good things come to those who wait.
I am still safe: I know you all love me and are concerned about my safety because of the fighting between Lebanon and Israel. Click here:
http://www.lib.utexas.edu/maps/middle_east_and_asia/middle_east_pol_2003.jpg
It is a map. You can easily see that Doha is not near either of those countries. Unless like 1000 miles is near.
Fan-e-mail!: I have fan-e-mail! I have questions. I have lots of it too!
“How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?”
-Hungry in Hampton
I remember Mr. Owl on the TV commercial saying 3. I cannot confirm that because they don’t sell them here. They do have Skittles however. It takes 0 bites to shove them down your throat.
“Your eBlog rocks! It is the best writing that I have ever seen!”
-Satisfied in the Springs
I’m glad you like it. I like it too. I like your attitude. I wish that more people would tell me how they really thought.
“I never knew you were such a humorous writer.”
-Smart in St Louis
Now you know. And according to GI Joe, knowing is half the battle.
“I will be Mrs. Maciek Pielorz on Friday July 21st at 1pm. Less than a week left of singledom...”
Congratulations! Another hot blonde is off the market. How do you pronounce your last name?
Fan-snail-mail:Thank you everybody who sent me stuff! I think you are the best! Without naming names, this week I got some cookies from my roommate, some chocolate-peanut butter cookie-cake from the office, some yummy fruit bars from a and some yummy snacks like PB-cereal mix and cheese crackers from a seet lady in Wyoming. You guys rock! You are the elite! J
More cruise ships: This week there were three (yes, 3!) shows that came to Al Udeid. Two (Yes, 2!) of them were country acts. Therefore, on a moral basis (and because I think country music sucks) I did not see them. However, I did see the third one. And it gets my highest rating given yet, 3 cruise ships! I really enjoyed them. It was a variety act from Australia. It started with a cover band, who ironically began the show off by singing “You’re so far away (doesn’t anybody stay in one place anymore).” You might think singing that to people who are thousands of miles away from home, most of which are here at least 2 more months, would be a crowd-killer. Ironically, it wasn’t. They then had a comedian. He was funny—when I could understand him through the Australian accent. The last act that night was a guy who placed third on Australian Idol, which is the down under version of American Idol. Can anyone even name what happened to the third place finisher on American Idol? I bet they are out here somewhere wandering the desert. I thought he put on a good hard rock show. Oddly enough, he played the Survivor song, “Eye of the Tiger” to a hard rock beat. Just try to imagine it.
The Package war: See how it shaped up:
Not Me: = = = = = = = = =
Me: = = = = = = = = = =
Yay! Thanks to my loving supporters I managed to squeek out a last minute win! You guys rock. The postcards turned out even better:
Not me: =
Me: + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + (23)
Postcards to me from:
Missouri/Illinois: + + + + + + + + + + + (11)
Colorado/Utah: +
Florida: +
Kansas: + + + + + + + + + (9)
Italy: +
I am surprised they were able to find 9 different postcards of Kansas. I didn’t think they would have more than one.
The winds change again: The winds of change have happened here again. It was cloudy yesterday. That is the first day we have seen clouds. Unfortunately they were not rain clouds, they were stratus. Those are the kind that cover the sky the whole day. You would think the cloud cover would keep it cooler here. Ironically, it was hotter then hell yesterday. It felt like it was 120F here.
My head is not on the right way: In a previous ePisode I was upset when I couldn’t get a new battery on base and had to wait until my trip into town. I did get my watch fixed. I also managed to lose the watch 3 days later! ARG! I broke down and bought a crappy $15 watch at the gift shop on base. I have to go buy another one that I like when I get home. I suppose I’m lucky I have not lost my head.
My top 10: So in the last ePisode, I promised that I would have part of a top 10 list. Here we go…The top 10 things that I will miss about this Forward Deployed Location.
4. Getting fan mail!
3. CurryDay!
That is all you get. Not because I’m lazy, but because I was hard-pressed to come up with #4 and #3.
Also please don’t send me more stuff at my Forward Deployed Location. I am still accepting yummy cookies and stuff. You may send me yummy things like PB squares, PB cookies, Curry Chicken and postcards at:
3896 Constitution Ave
Colorado Springs, CO 80909
More Yay me!: I managed to wreck a nice pair of headphones, (maybe they weren’t so nice if I busted them) but I have now listened to every song on my iPod. That is 800 songs! I believe that if I listened to 15 songs per hour, I had listened to the entire thing in 2.5 days. That is a lot of songs.
What I learned about the desert: You can get a cold in the desert. You can also get the stomach flu. Trust me, I know.
I saw a cat the other day at my Forward Operating . Or the likeness of one. It was this super-skinny orange feline that looked like it’s hair was falling out. I had seen some in Doha that looked as bad. I saw a lizard too. It camouflaged itself right into the desert. Kinda cool. Also the camp attracts a few birds. The hang out around the aptly named building called the “bra.” I tried to catch one to eat it because they look like a fig bird. That is actually all the animals I have seen other than the people here.
Picture of the week: This is me and my arch-rival Karate Gazelle going at it. It is the mascot for the Asian Games in Doha later this year. He beat me the first match (my hair is messed up from him) and I came back and knocked his horn off the second match.
Musings from the Mall: Why do I always end up eating at the mall food court?
There are 2 things I know about fashion. I saw an Arab guy who violates both. Apparently, it is social etiquette here to wear white after Labor Day and socks with sandals.
I also got to go down a 2-story ice slide that ends right in a wall. I’m not kidding. It was cold. I couldn’t make this crap up if I tried.
So after doing this exciting trip, what is next for me?: So after doing this exciting trip, what is next for me? That is a very good question. I’m leaving the desert on Saturday. I have to be at the airport at like 2 am! That means that most of you will still be up. From there I go to Germany, and a nice little trip. (I have to save something for the next ePisode.) Two of my coworkers are getting married the next week. After that I am having Lasik done AGAIN in my left eye. At least this time it will not cost me thousands of dollars.
When I get home, I will set up a blog site for all of these.
Fin: Many people have asked me if I was glad I came. My answer is an astounding yes. Even though I seem to whine bit—and moan, all of which I am extremely good at. It is the adventure; to go out and see the world: different ideas, perspectives and ways of living (even though I still disagree with all of them.). I would term this an “enlightenment.” Would I go again? I don’t know. Maybe. I think it is one of those experiences that you should do at least once. Kinda like hang gliding or base jumping or entering an eating contest. In the next ePisode, I will have some more really cool stuff.
As always, please pass this along to all your friends, your family, people you love, and people you hate. Tell them to email me at dhilburg@yahoo.com. If you want to be added to the mailing list, email me. Until next time, dream about me and my eBlog.
David of the Forward Deployed Operating Location in Southwest Asia
There are many flavors of milk served here: Chocolate, Strawberry, Banana, and spoiled. There are also several flavors of Gatorade: Yellow, Red, Purple, and icky Orange (none of which come spoiled). Why is it that milk is referred to by flavor and Gatorade by color? Is that a diss to Gatorade to identify it by color rather than flavor?
I am still at my “Super-Secret Forward Operating Location.” My time here is almost up. It will be a shame; I will miss the waking up and it already being 100F. I will miss the food that sounds good but doesn’t taste it (including the fries served without salt). I will miss working on a small conference table with 4 other people. Most of all, I will miss the 4AM walk to the bathroom from being required to drink so much water.
So they have poker tournaments and spades tournaments here on base. I ended up getting 4th in the poker last week and 3rd in spades.
Your Monday Morning Fix: So you didn’t get an ePisode of my time of an undisclosed location that is hot as hell in your inbox on Monday morning (duh!). I actually got more emails on Monday asking where it than any other topic, including votes from the poll. I know you love me, but good things come to those who wait.
I am still safe: I know you all love me and are concerned about my safety because of the fighting between Lebanon and Israel. Click here:
http://www.lib.utexas.edu/maps/middle_east_and_asia/middle_east_pol_2003.jpg
It is a map. You can easily see that Doha is not near either of those countries. Unless like 1000 miles is near.
Fan-e-mail!: I have fan-e-mail! I have questions. I have lots of it too!
“How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?”
-Hungry in Hampton
I remember Mr. Owl on the TV commercial saying 3. I cannot confirm that because they don’t sell them here. They do have Skittles however. It takes 0 bites to shove them down your throat.
“Your eBlog rocks! It is the best writing that I have ever seen!”
-Satisfied in the Springs
I’m glad you like it. I like it too. I like your attitude. I wish that more people would tell me how they really thought.
“I never knew you were such a humorous writer.”
-Smart in St Louis
Now you know. And according to GI Joe, knowing is half the battle.
“I will be Mrs. Maciek Pielorz on Friday July 21st at 1pm. Less than a week left of singledom...”
Congratulations! Another hot blonde is off the market. How do you pronounce your last name?
Fan-snail-mail:Thank you everybody who sent me stuff! I think you are the best! Without naming names, this week I got some cookies from my roommate, some chocolate-peanut butter cookie-cake from the office, some yummy fruit bars from a and some yummy snacks like PB-cereal mix and cheese crackers from a seet lady in Wyoming. You guys rock! You are the elite! J
More cruise ships: This week there were three (yes, 3!) shows that came to Al Udeid. Two (Yes, 2!) of them were country acts. Therefore, on a moral basis (and because I think country music sucks) I did not see them. However, I did see the third one. And it gets my highest rating given yet, 3 cruise ships! I really enjoyed them. It was a variety act from Australia. It started with a cover band, who ironically began the show off by singing “You’re so far away (doesn’t anybody stay in one place anymore).” You might think singing that to people who are thousands of miles away from home, most of which are here at least 2 more months, would be a crowd-killer. Ironically, it wasn’t. They then had a comedian. He was funny—when I could understand him through the Australian accent. The last act that night was a guy who placed third on Australian Idol, which is the down under version of American Idol. Can anyone even name what happened to the third place finisher on American Idol? I bet they are out here somewhere wandering the desert. I thought he put on a good hard rock show. Oddly enough, he played the Survivor song, “Eye of the Tiger” to a hard rock beat. Just try to imagine it.
The Package war: See how it shaped up:
Not Me: = = = = = = = = =
Me: = = = = = = = = = =
Yay! Thanks to my loving supporters I managed to squeek out a last minute win! You guys rock. The postcards turned out even better:
Not me: =
Me: + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + (23)
Postcards to me from:
Missouri/Illinois: + + + + + + + + + + + (11)
Colorado/Utah: +
Florida: +
Kansas: + + + + + + + + + (9)
Italy: +
I am surprised they were able to find 9 different postcards of Kansas. I didn’t think they would have more than one.
The winds change again: The winds of change have happened here again. It was cloudy yesterday. That is the first day we have seen clouds. Unfortunately they were not rain clouds, they were stratus. Those are the kind that cover the sky the whole day. You would think the cloud cover would keep it cooler here. Ironically, it was hotter then hell yesterday. It felt like it was 120F here.
My head is not on the right way: In a previous ePisode I was upset when I couldn’t get a new battery on base and had to wait until my trip into town. I did get my watch fixed. I also managed to lose the watch 3 days later! ARG! I broke down and bought a crappy $15 watch at the gift shop on base. I have to go buy another one that I like when I get home. I suppose I’m lucky I have not lost my head.
My top 10: So in the last ePisode, I promised that I would have part of a top 10 list. Here we go…The top 10 things that I will miss about this Forward Deployed Location.
4. Getting fan mail!
3. CurryDay!
That is all you get. Not because I’m lazy, but because I was hard-pressed to come up with #4 and #3.
Also please don’t send me more stuff at my Forward Deployed Location. I am still accepting yummy cookies and stuff. You may send me yummy things like PB squares, PB cookies, Curry Chicken and postcards at:
3896 Constitution Ave
Colorado Springs, CO 80909
More Yay me!: I managed to wreck a nice pair of headphones, (maybe they weren’t so nice if I busted them) but I have now listened to every song on my iPod. That is 800 songs! I believe that if I listened to 15 songs per hour, I had listened to the entire thing in 2.5 days. That is a lot of songs.
What I learned about the desert: You can get a cold in the desert. You can also get the stomach flu. Trust me, I know.
I saw a cat the other day at my Forward Operating . Or the likeness of one. It was this super-skinny orange feline that looked like it’s hair was falling out. I had seen some in Doha that looked as bad. I saw a lizard too. It camouflaged itself right into the desert. Kinda cool. Also the camp attracts a few birds. The hang out around the aptly named building called the “bra.” I tried to catch one to eat it because they look like a fig bird. That is actually all the animals I have seen other than the people here.
Picture of the week: This is me and my arch-rival Karate Gazelle going at it. It is the mascot for the Asian Games in Doha later this year. He beat me the first match (my hair is messed up from him) and I came back and knocked his horn off the second match.
Musings from the Mall: Why do I always end up eating at the mall food court?
There are 2 things I know about fashion. I saw an Arab guy who violates both. Apparently, it is social etiquette here to wear white after Labor Day and socks with sandals.
I also got to go down a 2-story ice slide that ends right in a wall. I’m not kidding. It was cold. I couldn’t make this crap up if I tried.
So after doing this exciting trip, what is next for me?: So after doing this exciting trip, what is next for me? That is a very good question. I’m leaving the desert on Saturday. I have to be at the airport at like 2 am! That means that most of you will still be up. From there I go to Germany, and a nice little trip. (I have to save something for the next ePisode.) Two of my coworkers are getting married the next week. After that I am having Lasik done AGAIN in my left eye. At least this time it will not cost me thousands of dollars.
When I get home, I will set up a blog site for all of these.
Fin: Many people have asked me if I was glad I came. My answer is an astounding yes. Even though I seem to whine bit—and moan, all of which I am extremely good at. It is the adventure; to go out and see the world: different ideas, perspectives and ways of living (even though I still disagree with all of them.). I would term this an “enlightenment.” Would I go again? I don’t know. Maybe. I think it is one of those experiences that you should do at least once. Kinda like hang gliding or base jumping or entering an eating contest. In the next ePisode, I will have some more really cool stuff.
As always, please pass this along to all your friends, your family, people you love, and people you hate. Tell them to email me at dhilburg@yahoo.com. If you want to be added to the mailing list, email me. Until next time, dream about me and my eBlog.
David of the Forward Deployed Operating Location in Southwest Asia
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